Episode 4: Surviving the Hollywood Party Scene without Drugs. Interview with Dominic Deluca

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In this episode, we interview our good friend Dominic DeLuca from Brooklyn Projects

Dominic is a former MTV VJ and has been a roadie for many of the top Metal bands on the world. He is also more obsessed with cats than Kiki is.

In this episode we cover:

  • Crazy Tour Stories from the road with Heavy Metal Bands
  • How Dom overcame his PCP addiction
  • Depression and Anti-Depressants
  • How to Socialize in Hollywood without drugs

Below is the video from the performance mentioned in this episode, you can hear Dom screaming quite loudly in the background!


SHOW TRANSCRIPT

Kaila: We are here with Dom a good friend of the band.

Dominic DeLuca: Oh we have the band now, are we doing the band?



Kaila: Well yes, two members of the band.



Dominic DeLuca: Two members of the band, with the 18, just the 18?



Kiki: Well that's Kath, Kath is 18 years old.



Dominic DeLuca: Yes, Kath is, she's 18 and I love Kathy Lee.



Kiki: We love you Kathy Lee.



Kaila: Oh I just watch this video the other day at Playhouse, and you are going T-Bone T-Bone.



Dominic DeLuca: Me?



Kaila: Yes.



Dominic DeLuca: Oh my God it's her name.



Kaila: Yes, I need to pull that out and play it on that thing. You are so loud in it.



Dominic DeLuca: But you know what's funny I actually saw a video. I have a video that I found on my computer of me and you and Kathy in the middle of the fucking night, literally two in the morning I think, driving up and down Melrose sticking have you seen nine on pick stickers, do you remember Kathy made those stickers?



Kaila: Yes.



Dominic DeLuca: I have the video and we are sticking it and I am climbing up, and like no climb on there the highest one, and I am climbing on the freaking poles to do this shit. Yes, we went all around Melrose sticking up all of these fucking stickers, these like those stickers of Kathy Lee, have you seen nine on pink - well who is nine on pink.



Kaila: That was a good, yes that was a good turnover.



Dominic DeLuca: That was a great market, that was amazing.



Kiki: You know like guerrilla marketing stuff, like even though there is always like digital marketing, there's like social media.



Dominic DeLuca: Guerrilla marketing is the best, because you are driving and you see it and you are walking and you see it, you don't have to be in front of your computer to actually see it, but that was like the, dude that's the best. I have a refrigerator and on my refrigerator I swear to God I have like pictures of you know random people in my life with me, and right in the middle of this collage, there's like this picture of Kathy. Do you know that sticker?



Kaila: Yes.



Dominic DeLuca: Everybody, and I mean everybody goes what the - what's that though? I was like it's my friend Kathy it's our band - and they say like but why the band, like she is the band? And I said oh no, no, no and I am trying to explain it to them and they don't get it kind of and I am like whatever, but everybody talks about that sticker - I have all of these other fucking stickers.



Kaila: Well we should have pulled out that sticker and used it more, I feel like we didn't use it enough.



Dominic DeLuca: You should make a T-Shirt out of it and it will sell like crazy.



Kaila: Wait I want to go back because everybody in LA knows who Dom is and we obviously know who Dom is, but can you introduce yourself for the people who don't know who you are?



Dominic DeLuca: Yes, I'm Dom.



Kaila: I'm Dom and I love cat.



Dominic DeLuca: Yes, I am a cat whisperer. I am Dominic DeLuca and I own Brooklyn Projects. I used to be a one-time MTV VJ, when MTV played music. I was a roadie for various bands and have a lot of dirt on them, and one day I want to write a book and blackmail all of them - unless they pay me all of this money that's my retirement fund. All of my pictures and all of my stories are my retirement fund to make money from all of these bands.



Kiki: Well you are apart, like I have seen some of your photos and I am like a huge heavy metal fan, and like I just like creep on in and I am like holy shit like he has pictures with [3:08]. When I was in, like I was 14 right, I used to do graffiti in my small town [3:14] all over Sacramento. So like when I saw that photo with you and him I was like are you fucking serious like is this real.



Dominic DeLuca: He was, like the first time I met Pantera it was with Anthrax, when they were still like a glam metal band, like they have like goofy hair, and Cowboys for Help, they didn't even come out yet they didn't even record yet, but I met those two and they were like - I mean I wasn't all party animals, but these dudes took it to a fucking level.



And then once they got big, I mean you know The Black Tooth Grin, which was the shot of Seagram's 7 and coke, and true story is I drink like maybe an ounce or two of Dimebag's piss for - I drank it for I think it was 3800, or it was about $4,000. So what do was like you know on a tour bus, I wasn't working with them but we'd just like hang out with them, and like we would be in Boston and like you know hey jump on the bus and backwards to New York.



I'm like alright it's a 3 hour or 4-hour drive, and I am like drinking on the bus playing - I taught them how to play Cee Lo and we are playing dice, and Dime is constantly like he will pay anybody to do anything, you know just name the price. And you know he piss in this little glass like a Dixie cup, and he was like alright and then it was like a thing I guess.



So it's like he has done it before - but I said no I am not doing that and he says like come on, come on. And I am like how much did you give so-and-so to do it? He's like it was like 3 Grand and I am like fuck 3 Grand, and he goes I bet you you'd do it for 3 Grand - I'm like fuck no. He's like alright 3500, I was like no and he's like 4,000. So he takes all of his money out and he goes here is 37, it was almost thirty-eight hundred bucks just drinking, and you can chase it down with whatever you want.



So I am like I have to drink the whole fucking thing, but he was like well you've got to drink at least half of it. It was like half of a Dixie cup, and I was like alright fuck it, and he's like its fresh brother I just did it. So it was more and I drink it, I just like gulp it and it tasted like beer because he was drinking 24/7, but then I took that - but just the thought of it I threw up but I made 4 Grand.



Kaila: I feel like there is a story with Ozzy Osbourne, where he like sniff the ants up for like $5. So like he does a line of ants, like real ant’s live ants for like five bucks. So you got a fair price.



Kiki: You made a fortune.



Dominic DeLuca: Fuck yeah, I mean he was so generous with his money, like in Vegas he would gamble like crazy and he would take people over his shoulder I'd be just looking and he'd be like, he says go man, just go man and get the fuck out of here and take your toboggan, I swear being of all times it's called a toboggan I don't know why.



But like go gamble, and he would give me like literally like $10,000 of chips, I'm like well fuck what am I going to do I don't gamble and I took it back to my room.



Kiki: I mean that must have felt really good. So he's actually quite a generous person?



Dominic DeLuca: He was; he was like the nicest giving. I have met a lot of people and he was definitely one of the nicest, he didn't let the fame get to his head. He was just like always on 24/7 partying, party mode, party mode.



Kaila: So we have you on the podcast today and our podcast is all about how we got sober. And somehow I've never seen you drink or do anything. I am just wondering how you made it through those crazy, hanging out with all of these rock stars and celebrities without getting fucked-up?



Dominic DeLuca: I guess well I do drink, you see me have a drink, I mean you'll never see me like.



Kaila: You do it sparingly.



Dominic DeLuca: Right, I am that dude that has a drink and I will hold it all night. There's a couple of reasons why I never ever got fucked-up. So I guess growing up I remember in the early 80s, the mid-80s early 80s, when coke was like really, really big. And I remember in one year there was two basketball players within the course of 5 months that died from coke on the court, one was a college kid.



Kaila: On the court?



Dominic DeLuca: You could Google it or YouTube it. One kid played for Saint John's which is a big college basketball team. He was running during a major game and he just collapsed on the floor, and he had a heart attack and he was like 18 or 19. And then later on I hear that cocaine in his system, and then a couple months after that another basketball player died of coke. So I was fuck I don't want that you know.



And then seeing like, I was always scared like I try. I never smoke cigarettes, I tried when I was 12 or 13 and I cough up my guts and I said oh my God this is whack. I mean people smoke and I get it but I just couldn't deal with it. And then I tried weed but weed was a lot smoother, and you know it was more like a controlled, I think it was less crazy than alcohol.



Because you know I drink when I was younger like beer and I hated beer, and I used to get wasted off of one drink and I'm like oh and I felt like shit the next day. So I was always like I really wasn't into the drinking thing. And I remember it was 18 to drink in New York at the time right, that was the legal drinking age in the 80s.



Kiki: Wow, cool that's a good time to live right



Dominic DeLuca: But you know what's crazier, when I went to you Europe it was 16 and 15, like you go to Amsterdam and you see kids like 14 and 15 that hanging out at the bar - I am like what the fuck. So I remember like my uncles owned a club called La Moore, which is like this big rock, it was a big Club on the East Coast. It was the biggest heavy metal club in the world and everybody and their mother play there.



So I used to hang out there all of the time, and they would never let me drink. I would try sneak in and you know I would get yelled at and stuff. So I remember like oh my God I am going to be turned 18 and I am going to get fucked up. Well I swear to God, the 2 weeks before - no the 3 weeks before I turned 18 the law change to 21, I'm like fuck. I mean I drink outside with my friends but I never really, really drink in a Club. And then on my 21th birthday I got so fucked up that I didn't drink literally for maybe a year or two because I got so.



Kiki: It's traumatizing.



Dominic DeLuca: Yes, I got really fucked up, but I had other addictions I had, I don't know if you know or maybe you know, or you don't know but I was like hooked on Angel Dust, which is like PCP.



Kaila: I know that, I thought you just never did drugs.



Dominic DeLuca: No, so the reason why I never did drugs was I started seeing what coke did, and in the crack epidemic in New York time where I can see what it did to certain people. I knew certain people in my neighbourhood, growing up and seeing them like really fucked-up, and then seeing people on coke and how they would act like I would talk.



It would be like hanging out with you guys and then you are on coke and you turn into this douchebag - but it was true you know, I never ever did it, and then I always used to think like when people did coke it was always like, they wouldn't do it in public.



Kaila: Because it's a ritual that's the whole thing.



Dominic DeLuca: Yes, well later on I found out with the bands and stuff, they were doing it right in front of you on the tour bus. But my point is if it's so bad, you can drink in front of somebody and problem, you can smoke or drink in front of them you could do anything, but you know coke it's like a bad thing.



Kaila: Well the reason why I did coke secretly was because I didn't want to share it with anybody. So it's like only you are allowed to come and you are allowed to come, everybody else out.



Dominic DeLuca: So I just never really wanted to do it and I started selling it, and I was like wow I am making a lot of money from it at a young age, but from there I got hooked on PCP. It was way worse than coke, but you would sprinkle it on your joint, I mean it was insane but the feeling. And I think with that you are not sniffing it because it's not like really putting in - that's why I never did the hard drugs because it will kill, I never even did pills or mushrooms.



Kaila: Wait I don't even really understand what PCP is?



Dominic DeLuca: It's embalming fluid crystallized.



Kaila: Do people not take it anymore, I don't hear anything, it's not like crystal meth it's just its own thing.



Dominic DeLuca: It's its own thing.



Kaila: But why does nobody take it anymore?



Dominic DeLuca: I think with meth you get more bang for your buck and it's more of a crazier high. PCP was more like you are smoking weed and it's like, oh you feel like great and you feel. I guess it's almost like coke I think but you just feel like invincible and everything is just elevated times ten. And I used to smoke it with this one chick who used to get really good PCP. Her name is Bambi she was - that was her name Bam-Bam and she live in Queens, and she was kind of like a stripper groupie chick, but she was really cool.



Kaila: Yes, Bam-Bam was a stripper.



Dominic DeLuca: And I remember like she used to sprinkle it on the joints. That's how she uses it when I got turned on to it, and then from working at Def Jam, I am not maintaining any names but there was a rock group that were very-very, I used to hang out with all-time they were in my age, or a little bit about a year or two younger older than me, but they were heavily into the dust. And I got hooked on it like legit hooked on it, like I was smoking it like every other day.



Kaila: Does it have a comedown like where you are addicted?



Dominic DeLuca: It wasn't like, fuck I am sitting at home and I want to get high. It wasn't like that but it was like that smell, it had a distinct smell and I was like oh man it's like so cheap and so readily available. Again I never took mushrooms before I never snored at anything. So the idea of smoking you know and its weed, because in my head oh it's a little sprinkler of whatever, but now looking back I think it was worse than smoking crack really, do you know what I mean.



I had my moment of clarity when oddly enough I was with Bam-Bam with a bunch of people, and then we went to this club in Queens and I wound up like smoking with her and I wound up like going back to her apartment, and she [14:40] she wanted me to piss on her, and we were high. So I was like, but then when she was telling me like I want you to come back to my apartment and piss on me, I was like fuck myself with a dildo. And I am thinking to myself wow, because she used to date this guy name Vinny, he was like this dude and he used to hangout. I worked with him at a Record Label in the stock room, and he always just like piss.



Kaila: So did he shower afterwards?



Dominic DeLuca: He would pee on her and she would pee on him, because we had this conversation at her place.



Kaila: Did he get peed on and then not take a shower?



Dominic DeLuca: I don't know but he always smells like not clean and I'm like oh my God that made a lot of sense. And then I will never forget, she didn't have a bed she had a mattress on the floor, it was like a flop house. And then she put this plastic sheet on it and she want me to pee on her. So I did and she was drinking it [15:44] it was naughty and I was like what the fuck, but then I was like I am going to leave I am going to get more beer, and I just told Alexis that I can't stand this fucking place.



I went back to the club and I stole her fucking little bag of PCP. And then I went and saw some other friends at this club and started smoking again. And then it was November I woke up literally on the side of Queens Boulevard with no shoes, no shirt, no jacket and no money, like I got robbed I don't know what happened but it was cold and I was coughing. It was lightly snowing and raining and I was like what the fuck.



And I saw a cop and I told him what happened and they called an ambulance, and put me in an ambulance and I was in the hospital for like two-days. And after that I was like yeah I am never going to touch this shit ever again - and then I just stay away from it and put out people, and then three or four months later the smell of it was like - but I know the smell and it made me so disgust, it made me like want to throw up, so I never did it again.



Kiki: So you were able to just cut it out completely?



Dominic DeLuca: Yes.



Kiki: But that's a pretty traumatizing experience?



Dominic DeLuca: I mean yes, it really was like, it was fucked up I never had anything like that happened to me before. So my whole thing is if it fucks you up that bad or you feel that bad, then why would you want to do it again?



Kaila: You would think so but we are different.



Dominic DeLuca: And nowadays it's kind of crazy when I see the new kids that work at my store. They have been partying and they do coke and I tell them like you can't, but now they are chilling out because a lot of people now are gone from fentanyl.



Kaila: Wait what's fentanyl?



Kiki: That's the new, that's the Jammy Jam.



Kaila: Wait, that's a new drug that I have not even tried?



Kiki: Yes.



Dominic DeLuca: It's literally, like look, this little speck will fuck you, in that case it will kill you.



Kaila: But what does it do, what is it similar to?



Dominic DeLuca: It's like OxyContin times a thousand. It's a super painkiller.



Kiki: And that's actually taking the streets over heroin now, it's really, really out there.



Dominic DeLuca: And they are cutting it with coke, they are cutting it with coke - but like some kid just recently, and I kind of tripped out over my two friend at my shop doing construction. They are drinking and partying, that's their thing they have been like that, you know we know people that that's their thing. And I went into my office and one of my friends a pro skater, he comes into my office - and he's a big partier.



He comes in and he's like yo, he's like you've got somebody dying here, and he looked like he saw a ghost. He said somebody is dying in your fucking - homeboy is dying in your secret room and I am like okay, because he's always busting my balls, but I am looking at the camera and he's like dude look, and I see one of the dude on top of the another dudes. I see his legs moving and like what the fuck is going on.



So I go there and his brother he was drunk, and he's trying to like [18:54] so it's like do a CPR [unclear] what the fuck you called an ambulance and it's all good, it's all good. And I am like he's blue that dude was blue, the dude was dead in my thing. So Marcus called an ambulance and two ambulances come and like they were sustaining him and they took him away.



They put him in the ambulance and they give him all of these like adrenaline shots, and the waiting and then they got a fake pulse but he was dead, when they came he was dead no pulse dead. Wow what did he do, what did he do and my friends was like an idiot, he was like well he was just drinking, and he's like no, what did he do? And then I didn't see anything and then one of the kid like they were showing him some stuff and I am like yo, but later on it was Fentanyl.



Snorting Fentanyl, and then revived in the hospital some couple days later - yes I am sober now and this and that well cool. But then not even two weeks ago he came to the store and he's hanging out, he's drinking again and he did a bump and like oh this is good stuff. I'm like you just fucking died, like are you kidding me like I don't understand the mentality.



Kaila: I think when you are actually addicted. I think there's like a person like a heavy drinker, and then there's an addict or alcoholic and they have a disease, there is no logic to it.



Kiki: I think it's amazing though that you were able to like, like your personality I guess isn't, and you are lucky too because PCP is serious I mean that's not a joke, like you see on the news some guy is like naked and he's like trying to break into the store [20:25] that was the PCP guy you know.



Dominic DeLuca: That was it, when you are on PCP you are like - it was on the news like dudes would be naked and you'd shoot them and they would take [20:40] getting shot all of the time and come on come on. Yes, you are worried, you turn into this animal because nothing, you are just numb and you have so much adrenaline, but it's such a crazy high, I mean it makes your fucking $10 bag of weed fucking, it's like oh my god I feels like a million bucks and it's just like.



But I never got up to the heavy drugs because I was always scared, and it's just weird hanging out with all of those people. And I would fuck with people sometimes when they would do coke. I would be like hey do you want to go do coke and I am like yes sure. And I go into like a closet or a bathroom where it would be like me and you know some whatever, two or three girls and like they would put it on a thing and pass it around, and it would come to me and I would be like no you are up.



And as soon as I did that everybody got, the vibe went like, you know the vibe went like what you don't want and I am like no maybe next time around, and they go well this is it then, and I am like no I want to watch you guys it's more interesting. Okay and they were doing it and then the girls but you know I barely do this - I'm like oh my God I don't care.



And I would do that I'd be like oh Mom this is so fucking dope. So I would do that a lot I would be like I mean let's do it. The closest thing I think I have ever had doing coke was, and it's the closest it was like having some, a girl that I was dating in the early 90s sniff it off my dick, that was her thing, and you know what's crazy, I am so [22:22] to things. So there's a girl that you know or I think you know and Kathy Knows.



Kaila: Did she have blond hair?



Dominic DeLuca: No she didn't she had dark hair. I went through a breakup, this was like 2004 or 2005, and you know she was like let's hang out, let's hang out but I thought she was like a normal girl so [22:44]. And then one night she calls me up and she's like hey I am at Hollywood are you home and I am like oh hell yes, you know it's about to go down so I'm like yes I am home.



And then she's like okay I am at Stem, come over with some beers, and I'm like sure come on over, and she came over and it was like 11 o'clock and you know we're drinking and watching TV, talking and laughing and whatever. It's a normal girl with a normal job like this normal chick. And she goes we are finished but she pulled like a six pack of beers and whatever, but she said anything else to drink and I am like yes I've got [23:17] like you know you've got vodka or whatever.



I go into the kitchen of my old place and so I turn the thing and I am making drinks in my kitchen. I turned the corner and she's cutting - I have two drinks in my hand and she's cutting up coke on a CD. And I look at her like this and I go, and I was shocked I swear to God I was like what are you doing? She's like oh I sniffed just a few baby it's okay, I am like no I was like really, she's like yes you don't party? But I was like no I don't and she's goes oh my God I am so embarrassed, I am sorry I thought you, and I am like no and she goes oh - she goes well okay thought you did you know like every time I see you out you're like.



Kaila: And then like buy, like back then - this not fun.



Dominic DeLuca: No, she got really weird and then she left. And then I was like, well I told her I said this isn't 1988 I am not into that shit. I got so bummed out I guess because a lot of girls I knew, everybody party in the mid-2000s. And to find a girl that didn't, I would be like oh she has got some act or [24:25] model, but she's got like a normal job but then she just like fuck man.



Kaila: I remember I would go out to like raves, and the nerdiest people from college like Asian kids would be out there partying and be like you are here.



Dominic DeLuca: Had I done drugs I think that I would be so much further in my career.



Kiki: Really?



Dominic DeLuca: Yes, I think drug back then it was a networking thing, you know how nowadays like old white dude, older white dudes they go and play golf. It's a bonding thing and like deals are happening at the golf course. In Hollywood it’s coke it was the after party come to the like - you know whatever Paris his fucking house, it would be like every fucking night there would be after parties there and they would bring their mother.



And it would just be like you know the weed was like [25:23] coke and coke and drinks and coke, and I would go and I would be like well I am not doing it. So I just go home I don't need to be staying here until 4 or 5 in the morning, but people over the years from going there and networking. There are people that had zero talent and 2 years later I am an agent at CAA, or I am a producer on this movie, and it's like because they are doing it.



I mean there was one dude, without giving too much away. There was one dude that nobody knew what he did but he worked at a major shoe brand, a sneakers brand but he was always around and always with people - he could do no wrong and he's always like getting LA Sneakers, and making the biggest deals and hanging out with the biggest celebrities and sports players.



And he had a job at this company and nobody knew what he did, I mean I knew him but then eventually after 14 years he left. And I am like what the fuck I don't understand. So I see him recently and I am like I have to have ask you, what did you do there because things I couldn't get done for my shop and my brand. Sometimes he would be like let me talk to them and I'm like alright. And he would get things done that were really impossible.



And he was like the higher up, he was their plug to get them coke. He was the in-house drug dealer. It was like a secret society, like hey I work at this big company and I can't do AB and C, I'm going to have a guy there and you are going to meet me here - it was something like it would never get out because you are working for us, so I've got your back and you've got my back.



Kiki: Holy cow that's wild, and its almost more proof in the pudding that those types of substances actually create business opportunities.



Dominic DeLuca: They do absolutely



Kiki: It is extremely difficult I find like, and also fascinating that you were able to create such good Network and such a successful business and you continued. And that's I think extremely admirable in this Society because [27:26] and in bands you know you are required to drink, you are required to be at those things.



Kaila: And to be around each other.



Kiki: I mean yes, even to survive.



Dominic DeLuca: And that's another thing like there was some people, like it was so weird like the network aspect. When I work with MTV because I didn't do the hard drugs I just smoked weed, but I remember again it was networking. There were people that got jobs there, one day you just come to work and there is a new VJ, and it's like who the fuck is this dude, you know but like he's getting all of the Primetimer. And it was because it was favours it was like backdoor deals, it was coke.



And I remember there was one VJ who was a friend of mine - he got sent to the rehab for coke three times in two years. And MTV was just like you know they paid for these stuff, it's like really good places you know, and they didn't like [28:21] like okay, but I remember I got caught smoking weed at the Spring break thing that they do every year.



I got caught smoking weed and I was with a bunch of kids, like oh shit I'm on MTV and you are smoking weed, and then like the producer saw me and like, what are you doing you can't be smoking weed, you know people know and I am like it's just a fucking joint. And then the next day I get told in the morning hey you have a ticket to go back, I am like what, like yes you know you have to [28:55] and get back like you are not supposed to do drugs, you can't be smoking in front of kids.



And I'm like wait, I smoked a joint and you sent this dude away at that time twice for coke, and you are coming down on me for smoking a joint, and then like that's not your business doesn’t worry we will deal with him, you know he was more on a bigger Network than me. But it's all because he was doing coke with fucking the vice president, so I was like well he could do no wrong so I was like okay.



And it was kind of whack I was like that's why it came time for me to continue with MTV after 96 when [29:25] I was just like no I don't do it because it just became like a favouritism and all this bulshit, so I was like wow that's kind of whack, some of these people you pay for them to go away for coke, and I basically get recommended for smoking a fucking joint, get the fuck out of here.



Kaila: It's pretty crazy though, I guess you've been in the industry forever so you've seen a lot of musician get sober. How has that been like after getting sober. Have their lives gotten better or has their creativity?



Dominic DeLuca: No, like one of the things that bums me out is seeing somebody that, like for example I love him, a friend James Hetfield, he's always been the fucking fuck yeah, you know like anger Hanks and drinking, you know like that's the James that's the talk I love, and when he went sober for a couple of years God bless him he needed it okay fine, people that need it good.



But then seeing him, if that was your persona and that's what helped you create what you have when you were drunk or high the whole time, and now you are sober. It was weird seeing Metallica and seeing James holding a couple of water gun, hey everybody we have a good time out there yeah, it was just like.



Kaila: But could it just be because he's older now, like maybe he has kids and a family?



Dominic DeLuca: No because it wasn't like he was 45 and then all of sudden he's 55. It was like he was 45 and got sober at 48, and you know he fell off the wagon again and he went to rehab. I mean I think playing you know shows on that level - it's tiring and I think you need a drink to take off the edge, it's everything in moderation you know I really believe that.



Kaila: But I must say that if you are an alcoholic, you can't do one in moderation because one drink leads to five-hundred.



Dominic DeLuca: I get that part of the alcoholism and all of that I get it, I mean Metallica was called Alcohola that was their [31:15] that they had. It's just weird seeing people that you know they go sober; the one thing I don't like about people when they go sober is there's some - and I don't mean this in a bad way, you guys never did this and especially you. They went sober and now they act like, they don't even say hello to me.



Kaila: Because you are not even like a drinking buddy because you are not a hard-core partying guy.



Dominic DeLuca: Yes, but apparently like anything from the past it's like you can't really associate with. This is for alcohol but it's true because not only me because I thought well maybe it's me, but other people that were kind of like, unless they are sober and in a program, they don't hang out with them. They're just like oh no I don't want to associate anything with that part of my life, and its kind of whack.



And like yes, like you said I never really got fucked up and it's funny, there's kids now that were sober, they were straight edge back in the day, I remember this because we hang out with a lot of straight edge kids. This one band Quicksand you know a crossover band, amazing I love them - they were totally straight edge, and I remember getting them on tour with Anthrax and [32:17] as the opening band, and this was huge for them, this was a New York Parker band playing in arenas.



And they weren't drinking, and then like I [32:27] and I said I need a tour I'm going to have you guys fucking partying and this and that, but at the end of the tour I hadn't drink one. And now they drink socially most of them, but a lot of people that I knew that were straight edge back when they were 18 or 19 now they drink, but they are not alcoholic they have a couple of drinks. I think drinking is more of a gateway drug than marijuana or coke. I think drinking leads to like, oh I'm drunk have a bump it will wake up - and oh wow this is good, and I never understood that because I know people that they wouldn't wake up.



Kaila: Well it doesn't sound like you got drunk, like you might get buzzed?



Dominic DeLuca: Let me tell you, the last time I got drunk, one of the last time was a party that we did at the W Hotel in West LA by UCLA. We did a party for VSC 2005, and we had all of the banners, it was a big party it was Labour Day party. I got a hotel room there and I start drinking at like 11 a.m. All I know is that I literally woke up in the hotel room at like 9 o'clock at night - I don't remember I swear to God.



And there was a bucket with puke in it, there was empty liquor bottles and I am naked and I'm like what the fuck. The bucket is right there and then I was like what the fuck, and then like somebody is in the bathroom and I am like what the fuck is going on. And then it's this girl I know Julian, who is like a friend of mine who is a waitress there, I guess we fuck and she goes oh my God are you okay, you were like on you were raging around.



She goes oh my God you whooped out your dick and was like fucking slapping it across your friend's head, you were out of control. And I don't remember anything and I felt so - I had to stay at the hotel like from that 9 o'clock until the next day until like 4 o'clock I couldn't, and I was like you know what I am never going to get fucking wasted.



And then a couple years later [34:47]. So I had a couple of drinks and I was a little loopy [34:56] wasted. And I was with this girl who had like weed, and she goes let's go to your place and smoke and I am like yes like oh wow. And I get in my car and I am drunk and all of a sudden she's drunk, and I pull up to the parking lot and I'm like losing control a little bit - I guess there was cops there because [35:19] and they would always stop.



They pulled us over and now I am drunk, I mean I know I was drunk, and then they come with flashlight and because of the shop a lot of the cops knew me. So it was my homie, he's like oh no he was like I told him not to drive, and I said what's up so and so? He was like pull the car over and I go no due I am going to get some pussy, you're fucking my shit up and like it's loud, and like no, no pull the car over.



So I get out of the car and he gets in the car and he parks it for me, and I am standing there and his partner comes and he said look get a cab, and I was like I don't have no money for a cab fuck that, and I am being combated, I said you are fucking my shit up and then I am like, because we talk about this later on like I said I still see him a lot he's a homie of mine. They put me in the cop car with homegirl and they took me to my house.



Kiki: No way, they saved you.



Dominic DeLuca: They saved me but I was so like cursing them and like [36:18] you're a dick you are calling us like you would fuck the police and all of this shit, and I guess I was that fucking drunk, but they took me home and I was like oh wow and I say you know what I dodged the bullet, and after that I never drink and drive again.



Kiki: So you wouldn't consider yourself like an alcoholic at all, you had like a couple moments that were pretty not like.



Dominic DeLuca: I'm a pussy and she knows, it's like two drinks and I am like well let me tell you.



Kaila: I've never seen you drunk, I barely even seen you drink.



Dominic DeLuca: No because you know when we used to go out to these clubs, we used to go out literally and it was like we would go out and we would go to club. We would go inside and I would have one drink and hold it for like 30 minutes, and she's like are you ready and I'm like yes I'm ready.



Kaila: This is me and Kiki too, we will just like make the rounds and then gone.



Dominic DeLuca: We would do it all of the time so it was like okay.



Kiki: But see, I wish I can do that, I was like all or nothing always most of all.



Kaila: Yes, if you got me doing coke I would do it until I was gone and there was no dealer calling me back.



Dominic DeLuca: I remember you like 10 years ago. How long have you been sober?



Kaila: 6 years.



Dominic DeLuca: Okay so I remember 8 or 10 years ago. I remember you are in Vegas and you called me, she called me but I never seen her fucked up, because she was like online and she was like sober do you know what I mean, but she wasn't like falling, and I remember she called me and she got me worried, and she calls me 3 in the morning and she is in Vegas. And I am like I didn't answer her at first and then she called me back again, do you remember this phoning?



Kiki: This is an Ambien call.



Kaila: I have called a lot of people apparently when I am high.



Dominic DeLuca: So you called again and I am like what the fuck, so I go hello and she's like hi, and I was like Kaila what's up are you okay and she's like yeah, but why? And I go you just call me and you're like where are you, I was like I am in bed. Well come to Vegas and I was like I am in bed it's 3 o'clock in the morning.



I was like are you okay and she's like yes, and she goes I just wanted to call you and tell you that I love you. I was like well I love you too are you sick? Yes, and she's like I really love you and I am like okay, are you okay and she goes yes I took some pills, and I was like what pills? I don't know it makes me like tired but I just wanted to call to tell you that I love you - I am going to go now; I am like are you sure you are okay?



And then like yes I will call you in the morning, and then you went to sleep, I mean you hung up and I was like okay and I called you back and you answered and I am like okay, but then I called you again and then like the next day you are like, I said hey do you remember and you are like no. And then you told me what happened and I go oh okay, so then I was like okay that's the only time I've ever seen her.



Kaila: I wonder how many people I call and I don't know.



Kiki: She called me too it's crazy, and that was before I was [39:14].



Dominic DeLuca: But does it make you sleepy though?



Kaila: No, but do not stay up. You take an Ambien and you go to sleep, but if you stay up you get all crazy and do all kinds of things that you don't remember, like people will go and drive cars and do way crazier stuff, or like eat Band-Aid or like do all kinds of craziness.



Dominic DeLuca: On Ambien - but I thought it makes you sleepy it makes you want to go to sleep.



Kaila: It either makes you go to sleep, or it makes you like in a waking sleep walk kind of thing.



Dominic DeLuca: Have you taken one before?



Kiki: I don't think I have ever take an Ambien, but I have heard lots of stories, and it's like prescribed by doctors which is nice.



Dominic DeLuca: But that's like - you know I take Xanax to fly and that's it.



Kiki: But that's what it's for, it's like you have high anxiety.



Dominic DeLuca: Yes, but the other thing is I don't really drink and get fucked up anymore because for the last 10 years I have been on an antidepressant, and I don't want.



Kaila: You are; I didn't know I am on one too. What are you on.



Dominic DeLuca: Paroxetine, Paxil.



Kaila: Prozac



Dominic DeLuca: So since going on it.



Kaila: Yes, you can't really do that.



Dominic DeLuca: Right, and I remember my doctor at the time telling me like hey - he gave me a list that you can't do this and you can't do this, I am like okay well I don't do any of them, but now I am like so cautious because I am on it, you know like I didn't know like I remember I felt all weird and I took like St John's Wort or something like that, and I felt like really fucked up like beyond help. And I called up my doctor and he wasn't there, so I called the pharmacy and I told them [40:55] have any medicine I am like yes [unclear] it's like oh no you can't take melatonin you can't take St John's.



Kaila: You can't take melatonin?



Dominic DeLuca: No, because melatonin was one of the things that fuck with your serotonin. Paxil, they built up they are fake serotonin so it just throws off your whole chemical imbalance. There is a lot of things you can take but certain cold medicine you can't take when you are on antidepressant. There is a bunch of things. You don't know because first of all, if you've been taking Tylenol Cold Medicine for instance for all of your life and now you are on antidepressants. You don't know and you are not going to read the thing, like oh you know it usually says high blood pressure or whatever okay, but then if you asked the pharmacy, that's why now anything I take, vitamin or whatever, hey I am on paroxetine can I take this - like yes or no you can't take this.



Kiki: That's interesting.



Dominic DeLuca: Well yes, I mean it could have an adverse effect do you know what I mean. So that's why when I took the St John Wort I was like really feeling weird, I just didn't feel like myself.



Kiki: And you can buy that at like any CDS and like that's available.



Dominic DeLuca: And all of these stuff, I mean I started having panic attacks but like my heart with race, and I remember when I went and saw a doctor for this. I remember I was in Brooklyn visiting my mom and I started having a panic attack, I don't know why, I am at home with my mom and nothing bad, I am just chilling and watching TV and my heart is racing like 180 beats a minute, like I'm in a marathon.



So my mom is like oh you want a little Xanax because she gets it from me to fly - I am like yes I will take a little quarter, and when I take a quarter I would be like, you know I would be really comfortable and nice. I took it half hour or 40 minutes, and I feel like kind of like the last part my heart is beating boom, boom, boom so my mom rushed me to the hospital.



I go there and they take me in and they admit me and take my blood pressure, but like what do you want and it was like nothing, and like I took a quarter of Xanax like no what else, I am like that's it like you took a Xanax and this just happen. They rush me right over there and then they hook me up on EKG and everything, and then like the doctor came to saw me and he's like you know what's weird, you know you have a lot of anxiety or something, it's not like - because the Xanax is.



I mean I was feeling like, mentally I was like tired but like my body and my heart was racing and it was going into fight or flight mode. And then I was like okay so then I went and he's like hey you may have a depression but I am just an ER doctor, go and see her regular. So I saw my regular doctor that I did have in Brooklyn and I called him back up.



I started asking those questions, and he's like look I don't want to send you into a shrink, because if you go to a shrink they will give you this and it's worse. I am going to give you the lowest dosage - I like personally I like Paxil, it's not so heavy and it's going to take a month or a month and a half to get it in your system when you do the smallest dosage and blah, blah, blah. So I am like cool, cool, cool.



Kiki: And you find it to help a lot?



Dominic DeLuca: Yes, but at first it wasn't helping because you have to have time for it to build in your system, but then one day it was just like, I mean I was having massive, massive panic attacks, like a big one happen when I was with Linkin Park in New York, and Joanne was just like dude are you okay the whole band was like.



I am in the dressing room and they are calling the ambulance for me and they are checking me, I was not but I was like yes I do would like some medicine. And it took about six weeks and eventually it just stops, I haven't had a panic attack forever. Here is the thing, I don't tell people and I don't care.



Kaila: Well now you tell us that.



Dominic DeLuca: But now it's like it's different, but hey you need a doctor because I am on antidepressant, but I think that people don't talk about that.



Kaila: Yes, they should really talk about it more.



Kiki: I think it's important too, because a lot of people are probably facing the same situations, because you know there's no one that you can share that information with, it's like how do you, you can have that conversation in the first place.



Dominic DeLuca: It's almost like taboo, like if you are on antidepressant like back, like seriously 15 years ago you are a whack job, oh this girl is a fucking nut job. Some of my friends were on it, they were on Paxil and all of these shit, you know there's like a stigma. It was like a stigma going to see you shrink, like well you are crazy you know.



Kaila: Absolutely, but now it's trending.



Dominic DeLuca: Yes, it's trending now you know, like people drinking their problems away and like masking it.



Kaila: Well your problems just get worse if you mask them.



Dominic DeLuca: Let me tell you what happened recently, which I can talk to you guys because you guys are girls, and you can tell me like hey okay we get it. The girl that works for me for a long time Monica, she's leaving after 13 years. She met this guy in New Orleans in some swamp tent, literally swamp tent. I am really worried about her because she has a drinking problem but she says she doesn't, she gets back out and drunk and this and that but she has been good.



But here is where we get into an argument, she met him there and he was sitting at a bar by himself on a Tuesday night drinking. Now to me, if I am going to go to a bar by myself I am going to go to watch a football game, or I am going to go hit on the bar - I know the bartender so I am having a little thing with her, or I would go with my friends. I am not going to go to a bar unless I'm having problems, or I am an alcoholic. Your boy is having problem, no-no that's normal, I'm like really normal to go to a bar. So now after knowing him for 3 weeks she's leaving everything and moving across country.



Kiki: To live with him?



Dominic DeLuca: Yes, leaving her apartment that she has [46:30] but at the end of the day it's like I look at her and I am like you are moving across country for a dude and the only; maybe you love him and all of that, but when alcohol, every time you see him on your Instagram or whatever you are like drinking, drinking, drinking.



Kaila: It's a bonding substance.



Dominic DeLuca: Right, but once you take that away what do you have, there is nothing.



Kiki: That's a huge problem I agree with that 100%.



Dominic DeLuca: And I've seen couples that had toxic relationships where all they do is drink or do drugs, and once one go sober - if the other person doesn't want to be sober then peace I am out. If you want to go sober you need from my personal experience, you need either a very, very strong support group, like one person that you knew that you could just talk to and confide in.



Or you have to have like in those cases, a life-changing experience that will really put the fear of God in you. Also like when you lose everything, I saw a person who literally a little over a year ago. This kid who a couple of years ago he was doing good. He was a top promoter and he had a house or an apartment - he was doing and he worked at an Ad Agency, he was great.



But I saw him literally, he came to the store homeless and I am like what happened - he was on the streets. And I'm like dude and I gave him some clothes and I still see him now he lives behind the alley - I swear to God and he looks [47:57] and he's oh can I get my shit together. I bought him a tent so he has it.



Listen I don't know if he's sober now but talking to him outside of my shops sitting down him, because again like [48:12] really realize it values people and once they are all in a way, you know I don't have anybody because that was our thing, and he didn't have anybody you know he didn't have family. And I think a lot of people on Skid Row or drug addicts, you know they had addictions and once the party stops, you know once the music stops and you have no seat to sit down on, the musical chairs, that's what happened.



You are left without a seat and like what do you do, and that's a really scary thing and that's the thing that the way the culture is now. Pills, pills, pills lean, lean pills. And after having all of these rappers like XX [48:52] died and Little Pete died, all of these people died from pills how do you still do it, and it's like reported like well yes it's okay, and it's a part of their music.



And it's like you can't tell these kids because that's what they see, like when we were going up it would be like Britney Spears, and you can't tell my kids wear this that's what everybody is wearing - my time would be Madonna and things like that, but it's like you know it's just so sad how addictions have taken away so much from so many people. I mean the one that hit me one of the hardest, other than when my partner Murphy dying.



My partner Murphy partied but he would smoke weed and drink, but he hurt his back a couple of years ago and he started taking painkillers, but you would see this dude going to the gym and fucking cuts his hair, like fucking eats well and like trains every day and this and that and you would never think - he went sober because he was turning into a Pill Popper and he went sober and then he started hanging out with these chicks.



And he took one dose and they thought he was like, oh he's just passed out sleeping and they put a jacket over him and a hat on his head, and they left, these fucking bitches, they left but he was found like 5 hours later and he was dead and over fucking pills. That hit me the hardest but then prior to that Chris Cornell, you know drugs [50:14] Alice in Chain drugs.



Kaila: I always want to know David Anthony Bourdain also right.



Kiki: I mean wasn't he kind of well-known for sober?



Dominic DeLuca: Yes, he was sober and then.



Kaila: But he wasn't like sober because he always drinks.



Dominic DeLuca: Yes, I believed he killed himself.



Kaila: Because he had the life that so many people drink, as many of the people that you are talking about also did.



Kiki: But it's a lot of pressure too.



Dominic DeLuca: It's a lot of pressure but at the end of the day it's like some of the people like Chester from Linkin Park. Dude you are in the biggest fucking rock band in the world, you have five beautiful kids.



Kaila: Oh he had a whole family.



Dominic DeLuca: Yes, he had two ex-wives, or one wife and one ex-wife. You had like so many people like you have your band, and now the band isn't open you just ruined it for everybody you know what I mean. And with Chris Cornell the same thing, pills and addiction boom he's dead, Anthony Bourdain, pills and he is dead.



You know in the 90s, Layne Staley from Alice in Chains, boom dead. Kurt Cobain was on drugs and kill himself, you know it's like there is so many people that because of drugs it kills a whole culture, like the whole 90s cultural, everybody from Scott Weiland from Stone Temple Pilots gone, you know what I mean drug and it's like drugs, so it's like it just sucks. And now I think it's more, it's harder to get drug but I think now it's worse, because doctors are less likely to give you a prescription, but now from Mexico and from China you are getting all of the bootleg ones that are not good.



Kaila: Oh those are the words because you don't know what you're taking.



Dominic DeLuca: Right, I think it's hard I think we need that support system or really-really, like the support system to help you. A lot of times just talking. If you don't have nobody to talk to I am going to teach you how to numb the pain, like I understand that 100% and that's the main thing, and getting off is another thing you know it's hard to get off. It's like I can't get off of like antidepressant.



Kiki: And jugs come in on a whole for types of forms, and I think it's like almost whatever your drug is. I mean it could be whether it's like pills or it's you know cocaine or alcohol, all of it is sort of like this crutch to get through, and to get through what you have to do on a daily, and I think in these like [52:47] there is almost like a sweet spot but unfortunately not many people can achieve.



Kaila: Not controllable, I know yes.



Kiki: And like you have to have enough just so that you meet James Hetfield on stage, but you can't have too much where you are hurting yourself.



Kaila: I think definitely like as to the support group I want to speak to that in Los Angeles, there is a huge recovery community. So definitely in LA it's really easy to find people to talk to, as most of the US does. So I think it's just important for you if you need someone to talk to, and if you don't have someone in your immediate circle there are people available.



Dominic DeLuca: Yes, there is a lot of people and a lot of support groups. I mean even like going to AA I have been to one with my friend taking him there and it's like.



Kaila: AA is kind of like accepted in LA it's just like so many people go.



Kiki: Yes, and there is a lot of creative people that go from means to inspiration.



Dominic DeLuca: Well listen here is the thing, you know there is certain people.



Kaila: There are Hang arounds who go right yes?



Dominic DeLuca: Yes, they are, but you know what though the thing is with AA. If you are really going because you want to better yourself, there is people there that have like high stakes and big jobs, and like you know if there is a way to save your life and get the support group that you need, and find a path so you are not homeless on the street.



Kiki: I think that's really important, I mean especially growing when I was a little more a hinge. I think there wasn't a lot of like anybody that was older. The closest older person might have been like 22 or 23 [54:25]. So like having someone like that is super important. And I think also sort of what you are touching on is like the idea of people, you know almost creating like a coolness from sobriety or staying away from drugs.



And you know even if like you know sometimes people have to be sober like sometimes. But if you want to reduce the amount that you are taking, or showing that you can be a badass rapper, or be somebody cool or be a successful business person. Or just know all of the celebrities and not have to use drugs. Like I think that's really important and especially for young people.



Dominic DeLuca: The young people today don't have like growing up - a perfect example like Paul Stanley and Gene Simmons Fame and Fortune girls who never took a drug. Never smoked a cigarette their whole life nothing. Simple wine when they were 13 or 18 for a Jewish thing, but never ever smoke cigarette or never did a drug, never drink and don't know what it's like.



But yet, more girls than God more fame than anybody, the richest people in the world, the biggest rock band in the world - you can do it. And I remember like do you know what that shit back in the 90s with girls, like certain models I am not going to mention names but like pretty big models I would hang out with them, but after a couple of times of hanging out with them and I wasn't partying they were like wow this guy is like lame, do you know what I mean.



They want to party but I am like yeah it's 4 o'clock in the morning I am going to go to sleep, you know what I mean but like oh Dom is cool but he's not that cool do you know what I mean so I get it. But you see them now and they are all fuck up, like this one girl particular her name was Emma, I went on a couple of dates with her, she was a pretty big model back in the early 90s, and I remember I took her like a dick.



Her favourite band was the Black Rose, so I know the Black Rose. So I took her to see them at the Beacon Theater. I introduced them and like Chris Robinson was like oh yes blah, blah, blah give them some coke. And I am like whatever and then she was like can we hang out with him, he is having a party at the whiskey bar, it's a Hotel downtown I remember. I am like no we are going to go here I said.



And the whole time she's like no let's go there, let's go there so I'm like no, no. And then she's like I am tired I am going to go home. So I drove her home and she didn't answer my phone call for about 2 or 3 days and I'm like whatever. And then I see her agent, because she was a model, this other guy who was a friend of mine. He's like hey well how do you feel about Emma, and I was like what do you mean?



And it's like oh well she's on the road with the rich [57:05] and I am like what, I was like get the fuck out of here and I told him the story and he's like oh yeah. And then I see her like a year later and they got married and they have kids, but they got divorced now. But my point is because I didn't do the drugs and party, and you know it's well like he did and he had the fame so that's happened quite often with me.



Kaila: But you don't want a girl like that?



Dominic DeLuca: No, when you are 23 or 24 years old and like what the fuck - well no I wasn't on MTV at the time, the year later I was on MTV. And all of these girls that dissed me they were like oh hi [57:41] sorry.



Kiki: Remember that ladies.



Kaila: Well that's a good note to end on. Where can people find you?



Dominic DeLuca: Well you can find me at Casa fucking Kaila.



Kaila: Or at the Cat Cafe.



Dominic DeLuca: Oh the Cat Cafe yes, we have to go to the Cat Cafe. If we don't go soon I am going to be really pissed, we have to go they've got a whole new batch.



Kaila: A whole new batch?



Dominic DeLuca: They do, like the one on West LA, have you ever been to that one?



Kaila: That's far, are you willing to travel for [58:18].



Dominic DeLuca: Okay that's like saying okay compared to Cat. That Cat Cafe is like sitting in economy, the one we go to on West LA it's like going to first class. You can find me at Brooklyn Dom1 on Instagram - the number one, or you can find me at Brooklyn Projects every day because I have no life.



Kiki: Alright guys, well thanks so much for tuning in and thanks for joining us it was so fun.



Dominic DeLuca: Of course, this is the best shit ever. We will do our next podcast live from the Cat Cafe.



Kiki: Alright, well that's it.

AUDIO FINISH 59:01

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